Today I made a to-do list at work, and you know what, I actually did it all. That has never happened in the history of to-do lists.
Now that I am an expert at being productive, I have a few fool-proof tips to help you out.
Fool-Proof Tips to be productive
STEP ONE: PROCRASTINATE
If you wait long enough, you will have literally no choice but to do everything in a rush because you have just no other option.
STEP TWO: DENIAL
If you don't put anything too challenging on your to-do list, it will seem like you did everything you were supposed to.
STEP THREE: FAKE IT
If you aren't sure the proper way to do something, just pretend you did it right and hope for the best.
STEP FOUR: IGNORE
If your to-do list doesn't get completed, rip off the things that aren't done and throw them away. If you don't have it on your list, then it isn't your fault.
STEP FIVE: LEAVE
If you pretend your list is done and just leave it, then no one can tell you otherwise.
That is it, five easy steps to being productive. Go do something now, or I mean, don't. It's up to you. I won't ever know one way or the other. Good luck!