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A Series of Inconvenient Situations

10/14/2015

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I just wrote a whole blog post and was about to publish it. 

The blog post was about how things tend to go wrong in my life. 

The blog post was deleted and not saved in my drafts as I went to hit publish. 

How will anyone ever know of my creative genius if the internet keeps deleting it?

Let me try this again. 

​My life is consistently full of garbage. If I am not sick, Dave is sick. If Dave isn't sick, my car is broken. If my car isn't broken, my dog pooped on a rug. If my dog didn't poop on a rug then I don't know, I can't find my sweatpants. 

Seemingly trivial things to a lot of people I am sure. I appreciate your struggles, really I do, but unfortunately for you this is my website. 

What I want to know is, if there is Karma, or whatever entity you believe in, why does it constantly seem like shitty things have to happen all the time. Why can't a day just be alright sometimes? It never is just wake up and be medium all day. I am not asking for a fantastic great day, I am asking for an alright day. 

Here is what an decent day looks like: 
  • Sweatpants - all day
  • Ice Cream - as much as I want without judgement
  • Chips - to balance out the sugar
  • Netflix - half hour comedies
  • Tumblr - not running out interesting things to scroll through
  • Pinterest - showing me cool crafts and me attempting them
  • My dogs making it one day without peeing, pooping, barfing or just generally being a pain in the ass

​That is really all I would need to have an decent day. 

A Fantastic Great Day would look more like this: 
  • NEW Sweatpants - all day
  • Ice Cream - that makes you lose weight the more you eat
  • Chips - That give you muscles
  • Netflix - releasing a secret 4th season of Happy Endings that is as good as the rest of that show
  • Tumblr - promoting my blog a bunch and then it gets super popular so that a publishing company is all "Hey, you want a book deal?" 
  • Pinterest - showing me cool crafts and me attempting them and succeeding 
  • My dogs learning a sweet new trick like, bring me the ice cream, or push the button when Netflix thinks I am dead. 

That would be a Fantastically Great Day. 

I may not be a saint, and I sometimes do shitty things like drive too fast or laugh at kids who fall off their bikes, but I just want to go one day where everything is just decent.

​I think there should be a rule where we get like, minimum once a month a day where nothing bad, nothing ridiculously wonderful, just only decent things happen. That should be a thing. Make it happen the internet. 

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