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Me: Hey Winston,

Winston: EVERYTHING IS AWFUL

Me: Okay but, why must you yell?

Wintston: DON'T YOU GET IT EVERYTHING IS TERRIBLE! 

ME: No, everything is exactly perfectly fine why must you bark and yell?

Winston: I HAVE TO YELL A LOT ALL THE TIME OTHERWISE EVERY ONE WILL FORGET I EXIST! 

Me: No, seriously I will never forget you exist. 

Winston: OKAY BUT DAVE ISN'T HOME AND THAT MEANS HE IS DEAD OBVIOUSLY SO I HAVE TO MAKE NOISE TO SUMMON HIS SPIRIT BACK TO HIS BODY. 

Me: Why don't you come sit down and take a nap? 

Winston: MAYBE BUT WILL YOU GIVE ME COOKIES IF I DO! 

Me: No, you are on a diet remember? 

Winston: WELL THEN I WILL SNARF ON YOU! 

Me: I do not care. You would do that either way. 

Winston: Hmm.. true. Okay I will take a nap BUT I AM GOING TO BARK QUIETLY UNTIL I FALL ASLEEP! 

​Me: That isn't the point. You are the worst.