So, have you ever been sitting around and realized that Tim Allen might secretly be in love with your mother?
Sounds crazy right? Or does it...
Hear me out.
Tim Allen used to portray Tim Taylor, a crazy car obsessed tool-man, AKA: exactly like my mechanic father.
Tim Allen played Santa Claus in a series of movies, my mom LOVES Christmas.
Tim Allen voiced a cartoon character in an amazing PIxar movie, my mom had two young children who LOVE Disney/Pixar movies.
Tim Allen now plays a hunting and fishing outdoors man, my mom literally owns a hunting and fishing store.
Are you going to try and tell me that this is just a coincidence? Are you going to try to tell me that Tim Allen isn't manufactoring his entire career to catch the attention of my mother? Are you going to pretend like this isn't a fascinating realization.
Tim Allen, my mother is currently taken, but keep trying. Maybe one day you will meet your one true love.
Have you ever wondered what the concept meetings look like for music videos? Especially music videos in the 90s? I have an example of how I think the meeting happened for Too Much by the Spice Girls, easily one of the weirdest music videos I know. Ready? Let's do this.
Too Much Music Video proposal Transcript
Gary: So, I have the perfect concept for the next Spice Girls video.
Bill: Okay Gary, Shoot.
Susan: Wait, is it going to have a story that will captivate the young audiences?
Denise: Yes, the last video your proposed to us that we used for the Backstreet Boys was so good we can't mess up.
Gary: Oh don't you worry, okay ready? We separate all the girls .
Susan: Okay... but half of their appeal is the group as a whole and the whole "Girl Power" thing as a team.
Gary: Susan, just listen. So after we show a firework over a war zone, we have Posh in a catsuit writhing beside a rocket ship wearing some type of cat ears. Then you show Scary wearing a scary necklace. Then Sporty should be wearing something that might be stylish at the time but is probably racially insensitive. Then Baby should be in a haunted house of sorts, and Ginger will be lost in time back in WWII.
Bill: Okay wait. So none of these stories are connected?
Gary: That's right.
Bill: Brilliant. Continue.
Gary: So each have their own little world. Scary is in a war, Posh with the rocket, Baby in a haunted house, Sporty in China, and Ginger still in the 1940s. They each sin their parts in their special little while we intersperse unrelated parts of their movie that is coming out because it's important to get that cross promotion going. Now using these other clips will save us money on new shoots and allow us to dump 80% of our budget on the explosions and special effects. Scary's war zone is exploding, Posh's rocket room is literally self imploding and Baby's bed is full on possessed. So it's important that noting actually resolves and their areas just end off with explosions. Except Ginger's, she should probably just hang out with some navy men.
Denise: Wow. Gary, that is really...
Bill: I mean, how can we even ..
Susan: It's garbage.
Gary: I know.
Susan: Perfect, get it into production.
watch The result below and see for yourself.
Have you ever watched something and then realized that you want nothing more than to work or at the bare minimum meet a group of people? Mamrie Hart, Grace Helbig and Hannah Hart are just such magical creatures and I am so happy they are such a cool group.
Like... seriously though? How did these humans get so awesome? Am I gushing? I am gushing. I would be embarrassed but you know, they deserve all the praise. I would like to make a movie with them some day. Or a TV show... Or a YouTube series.. or anything.
Grace, Mamrie and Hannah, I am in love with your amazing movie and all of you and if you ever want to meet a weirdo who has a million questions on how you make such amazing stuff please let me know!
When I woke up today I thought about what I would want to do with myself on this my 28th birthday. The only thing that I wanted was to watch Harry Potter movies all day.
Watching little Hermoine over enunciate... and little Ron stuff his face full of snacks... and little Harry being all confused about literally everything. OOP, just saw baby Neville for the first time! Look at those cheeks. Ahh, tiny Dean Thomas, how you still look the exact same now just much, much taller. My god this movie is so great.
Could you imagine how someone like me would have handled being sorted in front of a room like that? I would have been drenched in sweat and shaking so violently the hat probably would either vibrate right off my head or its voice would be all shaky. I feel like it would have been like my University Graduation where I blacked out and then didn't remember a moment of it ever but the photographic evidence shows pure fear in my face.
I think the sorting hat yells Draco Malfoy's Slytherin decision before he touches his head because the sorting hat can see that Draco is using way too much gel and doesn't want that all in its fabric. Do you think the sorting hat has lice? It gets placed on a thousand kid heads.. kids always have lice. I guess they can magic it away though. I wonder if there is anti-lice spells.
God there are so many stairs at Hogwarts. I get winded after like, one flight. Imagine having to climb up like forty flights just to go to your room? Even more if they decide to move and rearrange that day?
This is a long rambling discussion that is probably unnecessary for you all. I will stop now. Good day all!
Update: I am livetweeting me watching this movie (At least until I get bored) so go read that @tanosaurusrex
So suicide squad came out and the world seemed to throw a fit. I had still wanted to see it despite the bad reviews, so I went and kept an open mind and you know what? I liked it a lot! Is there some things that could be fixed? Yes. But is it a fun movie with lots of action and explosions? Absolutely.
Harley Quinn is cool. Yes she is over-sexualized but what else is new in the comic book world?
Deadshot is excellent. The only thing I love more than Will Smith is a sassy bad-ass Will Smith.
Everyone else, was probably fine.
The movie has a lot of criticisms I haven't read because I didn't want spoilers, but I assume it was about plot and such. When does a super hero movie really have much of a plot. I mean... other than Marvel movies because they are the best. But DC does not have the best track record. At least this movie was fun. Batman v. Superman was literally the most unhappy, dullest, most terribly awful movie I have ever seen and I have watched documentaries about the War.
So don't trust all the negative hype, just enjoy the silly popcorn excitement movie. Many explosions and many silly comments. Just don't think too hard and that's all.
Let's Continue to make movies with interesting women in the lead.