I am a sucker for an opposites attract relationship. On the internet this is referred to as "Shipping". I know 90% of you know this, that sentence is for my mother.
I am currently rewetting Gilmore Girls for the 900 billionth time because the reboot is coming soon and I want to watch at least the seasons that aren't the seventh season before it arrives. So it makes me remember how heartbreakingly sweet Rory and Jess are. He just is so into her its ridiculous. And she is so in love with him but she doesn't want to admit it.
They are way too cute.
The other best opposites attract couple is Nick and Jess. Maybe I just like couples where one of them is named Jess? But Nick is this gruff, grumbly crank and then Jess is a barrel of sunshine and optimism. Together, they have one if not THE greatest kisses in television history.
What are your favourite couples on TV? Any more Jess couples I missed?
Two of my favourite shows have announced they are doing a crossover episode this season. New Girl and Brooklyn Nine Nine. Two amazingly funny and witty and wonderful sit coms that brighten my day when I watch them. Some of these characters are perhaps some of my favourite characters to ever be written into a show. Here are a few of the interactions I am most excited for. Thank you Crystal for helping me figure these out!
Winston & Charles
It took me half a second to figure out how they would even cross them over, but then I remembered that cat-lover/fruity drink enthusiast Winston is now a cop. Granted they are in LA but who knows how this cross over will take place. Maybe Winston the cat-lover will either bond or conflict with Dog-obsessed Charles. Both are the ridiculous best friend of the handsome main character, and both just steal the show with their one liners.
CECE & ROSA
Cece may not be quite as hardcore as Rosa, but I think she might want to pretend to be. Maybe she will try to be as cool and badass and something will go wrong. We know that Cece used to have a motorcycle, maybe her and Rosa can go cruise together. Maybe Rosa secretly was a model back in the day with Cece? That would be a twist.
I don't know how, when, or why this is happening, but needless to say I am beyond thrilled about it.
Forest Nerd Pledge
I pledge that I will appreciate the combination of nature and technology.
I pledge I will wander without judgement of others in their nerdy endeavours.
I pledge to support my team members in their tasks.
I pledge that I will watch where I am going so I don't step on Chipmunks.
Crystal, Sandy and I went into a forest today and played Pokemon Go as we walked along a magical path that housed 1000 fairies and forest nymphs. We created a club of sorts, perhaps more of a Team called TEAM FOREST NERDS. If you wish to join, this is the pledge you must take. Take care my forest friends.
An actual Phone Call between me and the garçon.
Him: What's up?
Me: I was wondering *awkward noise* when you were home tonight?
Him: What? Oh, um, I wasn't going to be home until later? Are you okay? You sound upset about something?
Me: Oh... Um no, not at all. I was trying not to burp.
Him: Oh, of course.
Me: I am going to go eat some cheese ... see ya!
Him: Bye bye!
True love means trying to finish at least one sentence without burping, and then when failing, the other person still tolerates you.
There are many different ways you can love a person. Many different levels as well. You can friend love, significant other love, family love, best friend love, even love your pets. Sometimes the phrase "I love you" is over used and under appreciated. I know I am guilty of this, saying I love you to pretty much anyone who hands me a good looking ice cream cone. I have developed a few ways to say I LOVE YOU without having to say those words particularly. If someone says these things to you, you should know it means a lot.
HOw To Say I Love You Without Saying I love you:
Yes I realize a lot of those relate to food. If you haven't learned that the way to my heart is through my stomach, Harry Potter facts or Marvel Trivia you have not been paying attention very well.
I have been in a relationship for almost 11 years now so I think I have some valid tips for you if you are looking to keep that spark alive. Here is how we keep the excitement in our relationship:
Take Trips Together
Take mini vacations as often as possible, whether it be to the grocery store or the hospital, little times together spent not at home gives you something new to talk about. Also, when you have been to the hospital as much as we have, you get to know which nurses are less likely to bruise you when taking blood.
Get A Pet
Raising an animal together gives you prime opportunity to blame another creature for any messes you made but don't want to take responsibility for. Puppies also are good for blaming farts on when you don't want to be the one who cleared the room.
Nothing says romance like a big ol' burrito. Bring your loved one home a burrito and I GUARANTEE you will share a long and wonderful life together. Don't forget to get chips and salsa to get that meal deal. Your significant other will appreciate the salty snacks AND your savvy business skills.
I have never actually dated properly. I have been in the same relationship since I was 16... So clearly the most qualified person to give you advice on your interactions that may or may not lead to a relationship is this guy. Here are some fool proof dating tips from someone who knows absolutely nothing.
Don't Order the Most Expensive Dish, Order the dish with the greasiest amount of food
You always hear that you should order something fancy so they know you are a class act worth the big bucks, at least that is what 90s television taught me. Instead, my suggestion is to order the biggest most greasiest meal possible. At a steakhouse? You get that big ol' steak and baked potato with literally every topping on it. You go to a Mexican place? Devour that Burrito smothered in cheese sauce and four kinds of meat. You go to a fast food place (The perfect place for a first date) and you get at least two kinds of meat burgers and the biggest size fry possible. If they can't tolerate you at your most gluttonous... what is the point?
Look a Medium amount of good
For the ladies, don't wear your best dress on the first date. Wear you third or forth best dress. Save the best dress for a latter date when they have deemed themselves worthy. For the Gents, look good, smell good, don't be perfect though. It's about managing expectations guys. If you set this immediate standard of perfection you will never be able to regain that and then you will just always be swimming against the current.
Don't take it all so seriously
Here is the most important advice I can possibly think of. Dating is kind of shitty from what I hear, there is a lot of shitty humans in any situation, but when you are trying to find someone to spend more time with and trust that is even harder. Try not to force it, and just try to have fun. If they turn out to be awful, make the date AS AWFUL as possible. At least then you will have a hilarious story for your future memoir or podcast right?
So there you have it. Dating advice from someone who has never dated. If you have any other advice you think people should know feel free to share it in the comments!
I like my friends
they make me laugh
and act real drunk
when I'm totally not.
I don't often feel smart. I especially don't feel smarter than Dave. He is a very smart dude and can build and make whatever. However today, I got to have a two minute moment where I felt smarter than him.
The moment your significant other tries to light a fake candle on fire, is a moment you get to feel like a winner. Also a moment you have to worry for the safety of your belongings, because if said significant other is attempting to light things on fire that is an issue for sure.